Sleeping pattern

I read a lot of articles about how to train a newborn to sleep on his own and remember Ah Mei said every baby has their own prefer sleeping pattern. So I tried several methods. Carrie Phang told me maybe Ethan already addicted to my body smell when I cradle him to sleep in my arm and suggested I can try to put my clothes near him when I put him on bed. It really helps. For the first time, I patted Ethan to sleep without cradle him in my arm. I placed my clothes as pillow and rolled another as bolster. He slept for 2 hours plus.. 

Hooray. What a good start !!! 

Ethan 1st Day Out

21/03/2013, the fourth day since I moved back to CG’s house from Ah Mei's house. I almost broke down for taking care of Ethan boy on my own. Also, for few reasons, I was in dilemma whether to let my MIL to babysit him. My MIL is old and is currently babysitting a 1y9m toddler.  With another newborn, she probably cannot cope. And, she never explicitly agrees to babysit Ethan. When I asked her if she wants, and if she can, her replies were your baby is very cranky ler, very demanding ler, if your baby has to be fed every two hours, I think I cant lor, I think I try first, we see how la, bla bla …. Plus, she doesn’t want to let go the toddler and solely babysit Ethan. Then I suggested to her that maybe can look for a nanny to babysit Ethan till 6 months old. To my surprise, she implicitly agrees to. So, I knew by heart that she doesn’t want to babysit Ethan. I told CG about it but CG denied it and insisted to let his mum try to take care of Ethan…. How to try ?! With my presence, how my MIL is going to try to handle on her own ?? CG said just let her fully handle and I don’t interrupt or offer any help… Come on la, that is not my own mother !! How can I not offer help when I see her struggling between house chores, cooking, taking care of the toddler and my Ethan. Crying helpless on my own. 

Then, there came Ah Mei… She brought me and Ethan out for lunch and shopping. She said if she doesn’t come, she afraid that I will “qi siao”. Ha ha ha … That eased my pain a bit… At least, I don’t feel solitude during daytime. 

This was also Ethan first day out. We went Desa Park City for breakfast at Coffee Bean, then picked up Tiffy and Cayden from school and lunch at One Utama. 

 using Heston's stroller as Ethan's one was in CG's car

 wearing new clothes that xiao yi bought for his fullmoon

Overnight alone ...

Two days after discharged from hospital, mummy noticed you are getting yellowish. You didnt drink much milk. You didnt suckle well and most of milk was spit out from the corner of your little mouth mouth. You slept most of the time, was lethargic and hard to wake up. Your skin became dry. Poo poo and pee pee became lesser. Mummy examined your forehead and nose tip, you may have developed a jaundice.

On Saturday morning (23/02/2013), daddy and aunty (confinement lady) brought you to UMSC for checkup by Dr Lim. Blood was drawn from you little tiny heel for jaundice test. Mummy wasnt there with you but Mummy pretty sure you must be very scared. Blood test result was out and confirmed you have jaundice. Bilirubin level 274. You need to be admitted to hospital for phototherapy.

Mummy decided to send you to Prince Court Medical Centre instead of UMSC. (Frankly, I think UMSC is short of manpower, especially night shift. A nurse has to "one leg kick". I witnessed a nurse who in-charge for front desk registration was at the same taking care of a baby undergoing phototherapy and also doing other  errands)

It is a taboo to go outdoor in confinement month. But, Mummy insisted to go hospital with you. As the bilirubin level is considered high for baby less than 36 hours, double phototherapy was set up immediately.

Mummy pity boy boy, you looked so tired... Mummy very 心痛. Mummy felt so sorry. Mummy didnt take good care of you. Mummy brave boy boy, you must ganbatte. Fighting fighting ya.... you have to stay alone at hospital for 2 nights. Be brave and be strong. Mummy didnt abandon you. Mummy loves you so much.. Mummy promise you, mummy will not let you be alone again.. Mummy got to leave now...

** I kept talking to him and started to cry. My little boy has to spend two nights alone. He is still so young and fragile. Looking at his tiny body, fighting the jaundice on his own. I cant stay long there as I am still in confinement month and also with the fresh laceration (2nd degree). I cried and told the nurse :"I leave my baby in you good hand, please please take good care of him."

At night, chanting was the only thing Mummy can do for you. Mummy asked Daimoku to give you good health, to protect you, to help you recover faster. 

The next day afternoon, mummy visited you at hospital. Your bilirubin level dropped to 220. However, you still need to stay for another night. From 3.8 kg at birth dropped to 3.58 kg.

On 25/02/2013 morning. Your bilirubin level has decreased to 180 and Dr. Anna Padma said you can be discharged. Mummy cant wait to bring you home. 

Finally, you were home... NMHRGK !

24 hours of Mission Impossible

- 18/02/2013 -

10.05 am, I was still at Cheras house. Went for breakfast with elder sis before they headed back to Johor.

18/02/2013, 1.13 pm, I went for my weekly checkup at UMSC.

Prof. Dr. Siti Zawiah, my gynae at UMSC conducted pelvic examination (my 2nd pelvic examination). HAR ?!! AGAIN ??!! As I already knew how painful it is... I started to cry before the examination. Darling held my hand tight... Still no cervical dilation. So, Prof. Dr. Siti decided to pull my cervix a bit hoping that that can induce the dilation. I cried and screamed in pain...

 - 19/02/2013 -

2.00 am, labour contraction started. At that moment, I was pretty sure it was true labour contraction pain (Before that, I kept asking around how does contraction pain like as I had been on and off feeling menstrual pain and was confused). At the beginning, contractions occurred every hour and lasted about few ten seconds. I didnt tell Darling about the pain. 

6.00 am, the pain became more frequent, at about every 30 minutes. i briefly told Darling about the pain and continued to sleep. In fact, I wasnt really sleep but tossing left and right on the bed trying to get a better position to ease the pain. I thought the pain will not intensify so soon. 

8.00 am, I can't endure anymore. Intensity of contractions increased and became progressively more painful, more more frequent, at every 15 minutes. I started to feel panic and called Darling who just reached office. "Darling, can you come back now ar ? my pain is getting more frequent. I afraid that I cant wait liao... But, dun rush. Water not yet break and still no bloody show. Drive safely."

9.00 am, pain at every 10 minutes. Darling was stuck in morning traffic.

9.30 am, finally Darling was back. Without further ado, we headed to UMSC. Thank god traffic all the way was smooth.

10.50 am, I was admitted and already in labour room, preparing for the arrival of my Ethan boy boy. Another pelvic examination was conducted by senior nurse. ARGH !!!!! the contraction pain was so forceful yet my cervix was not dilated. Not even 1 cm.. OMG !!! I refused to put epidural before Prof. Dr. Siti comes. Therefore, the senior nurse suggested me to take laughing gas instead.

3.50 pm, still in pain. Finally, Prof. Dr. Siti was here. She conducted the 4th pelvic examination. Cried again... Why do I need go through such torturing experiences for so many times ??? No dilation... I want to pengsan liao. Prof. Dr. Siti suggested to put me on epidural and she will artificially break the water. Agreed. Dr. Wong Kong Kwong was called for putting labour epidural. During which, darling was not allowed in the labour room. According to a nurse "your hubby is very worried and is jumping outside". About half an hour later, I felt relief.... no more pain. "Darling, why are you jumping outside just now?" "I heard you screamed, I am not jumping, I am trying to peep from the window.." Then Prof. Dr. Siti broke my water. I saw and felt nothing. According to Darling, Dr. Siti inserted a device looks like a plastic elongated knife into my vagina, then a lot of water gushed out.I fall sleep after that...

7.10 pm, Dr Siti came to conduct the 5th pelvic examination. This time I no more crying as I felt nothing... Uhooo.... only 3 cm dilated. Based on general calculation, 1 cm of dilation in one hour. I need to have 10 cm dilation, which means another 7 hours. Dr. Siti checked and emptied my bladder with a straw-like apparatus. "Darling, a lot of urine ka ??" "yes, a lot." My bladder was full and I felt nothing.

147 was my baby heart rate ; 46% was the contraction. The highest was 70+% .. Thanks for the invention of epidural. 

10.00 pm, another senior nurse came to conduct the 6th pelvic examination, 7 cm dilation and Dr Siti was called to standby. 

11.00 pm, Dr. Siti was here and they set up the labour equipments. The practice here is epidural will be turned off. Dr wants mummy to feel the contraction pain and push instead of depending on the readings on machine. Argh.... pain was back. 

11.45 pm, Dr. Siti taught me how to push. "When you feel pain, just take a deep breath, then push as strong as possible like you are having hard stool. Dun push when u r not pain, ok ?!" "Understand." "Lets start.."

- 20/02/2013 -

12.00 am, after 15 minutes of pushing, I failed to push out my baby... Dr. Siti suggested to take a 15 minutes break for my cervix to dilate further.

12.30 am, Dr. Siti and nurses were back. The pushing process continued... "The pain is coming back.. ready..one two.. hmmmm.... hmmm....". Fail... Another try, fail.. fail.. fail.... "老婆, 加油. I see baby's head liao.." " Serious ?!" "Yes yes.." Then Dr Siti asked Darling to show me the photos taken to boost my spirit.

 

Ah... Mummy baby.. Mummy see you liao.. Mummy will try harder... "Dr, lets continue. One two ... hmmmm..." FAIL FAIL FAIL... I was exhausted and no energy liao.. I have been starving for 12 hours (Dr. Siti said no to eat in case I need to go for C-section as my baby is quite big).  Dr. Siti asked if I agree to have vacuum to help me. "Vaccum please.."

Another hard push with help of vacuum. PUSH...... 

"POP.." I heard something.. "Is my baby out already ?" "No no, the vacuum comes off..." "Help me please... pain is coming back.. Ready, push.. "

"老婆，baby head is out already!" "Dr.. Do I need to continue to push ?!!" "Yes. continue when pain is back." "Ok... ok.." 

1.11 am, another "POP" !!! "nga nga nga.... " baby is out, my baby is out... "Phew !"

 

Ethan boy was placed on my body. "Mummy boy boy, mummy finally see you liao.."

 

My baby, Ethan Lim Wei Zhang, born on 20/02/2013 

(农历正月初十一）, 1.11 am, length 53.5 cm, weight 3.8 kg

After Ethan boy born, Darling followed him to nursery and abandoned me.. :-(

"Dr., you see, my husband has baby, dun wan me liao.." " No worries, tomolo will be another way round." "ha ha ha.. true true !"

 Mission impossible was finally accomplished. 

Our 1st Wedding Anniversary 11/03/2013

11//03/2012, was a BIG DAY in my life.

Was our REGISTRATION OF MARRIAGE & WEDDING DAY !!

I was no longer single, I moved from my own house to someone else house. From this day onwards, I became a wife to my husband. 

 

 

One year passed, today 11/03/2013, I am already a mummy to my lovely boy boy. He is now 19 days old. As I am now in my confinement month, Darling & I cant celebrate our 1st wedding anniversary. But, we have our Ethan boy boy as our most precious anniversary gift.

Communicating with you...

Mummy keep talking and singing to you for the entire 10 months. I have decided your name once your gender is confirmed by doctor because I dont want to call you "baby" but to address you by your name (Ethan Lim Wei Zhang, 林玮璋）, Ethan boy boy, Wei Zhang boy boy.

Apart from your name, sometimes mummy also called you "mummy boy boy", mummy good boy", "mummy little precious", "mummy little hero", "daddy champion baby", "小猪猪", "mummy naughty boy boy", "mummy brave boy boy", "mummy obedient boy boy"....

Every morning, mummy says "ohaiyou mummy wei zhang boy boy", "good morning mummy Ethan boy boy". Mummy sings to you while driving to office.

"Today is Monday. Monday is a working day. Mummy is going to work now. Mummy is driving now. Daddy said, you must not move so much in mummy belly while mummy is driving. It is very dangerous. You must hold tight tight mummy belly and must fasten your safety belt".

"Today fighting fighting together with mummy, ok?!"

"Today is Thursday. Lets work for another two days, then there comes Saturday and Sunday. We will have two rest days."

"Daddy is going to bring us for shopping this Saturday."

"We are going for a movie today."

"We are going back to 外婆 house now."

"Hey mummy Wei Zhang, mummy finished work liao. How r u today ? what you have done for the whole afternoon ? Did you sleep well ? Are you comfortable in mummy belly ? Did you exercise ?"

"Aiyo Ethan boy, dun kick mummy so hard !"

Sometimes, you are so active that you kicked so much during weekdays and towards the weekend, you probably already exhausted and need a rest. Therefore you move and kick lesser. On one Friday, you didnt move for the whole day which scared mummy so much. Mummy immediately went to see doctor after work .... You, naughty boy boy, stop playing prank with mummy.

Sometimes, you get startled by a loud noise and became a starfish - you stretch all your limbs to max and that made mummy cannot walk. Ermmm... that was happened for the first time during mummy company annual dinner, then happened again when daddy brought us to pasar malam. Also, when we saw lion dance.

When Daddy brought us to watch Les Miserables at cinema, you kicked from the beginning until the end of the movie. Mummy not sure if you like the music so much or the music has annoyed you ???!!!

Before sleep, mummy said "太阳公公已经下山了，wei zhang boy boy is time to sleep liao. Outside is dark dark liao... Mo Mo (monster) is coming. Mummy wei zhang boy boy, oyasuminasai. mummy Ethan boy boy good night. Muaaakkksss. Mummy loves you loves you. Mummy baby sleeps tight. Mummy baby sweet dream."

Mummy has a deal with you, remember ?!

(1) Wei Zhang boy boy please remember mummy voice. When mummy talks to you and sings to you, u must calm down, feel peaceful, and dont be frustrated and cranky. 

(2) Daytime you follow 婆婆, dont bully 婆婆. You must remember to take afternoon nap, ok? Sleep is very important to you. You grow when you sleep. Mummy will send a few friends as your companions. They are Alex, Jack Jack, Bunny and Ginger Breadman. Mummy will come back as soon as possible after work. Then mummy will shower and feed you and we sleep together,ok ?

(3) Night time, mummy boy boy please dont make fuss. Mummy will make sure "nen nen" is delivered. Mummy will not let you cry in hunger. So, mummy boy boy no worries. If you make too much of fuss, daddy and mummy cannot take care of you at night. Then mummy have to send you to nanny. Mummy dont feel like want to do that. Mummy wants to sleep with you every night. So, be good boy, be mummy obedient boy boy. 

False Alarm

13/02/2013, about 1 am. I had been experiencing stomach pain since the night before. This is my first baby, I am not sure if the pain is actual labour contractions or Braxton Hicks contractions. Also, I felt that my baby is pressing on my pelvic bone that I cant hold him anymore. 

After went to toilet and wiped my vagina ("the part"), I felt the opening of "the part" is larger than usual. So darling checked it for me. He said he never seen "the part" is so widely opened. OMG !!! is our baby coming out soon ?! Without any delay, we took our maternity bag (which already packed) and headed to the hospital (UMSC).

My gynae, Prof Dr Siti Zawiah was away to oversea and will only be back on 14/02. The doctor on duty was Dr Vallikanmu Narayanan. First, she conducted a pelvic examination to measure the cervical dilation. When she inserted her fingers via "the part", I was not prepared for that (no one told me about this examination) and cried out loudly for the pain. The result is my cervix is not dilating. Then, an device was fixed on my belly to monitor fetal heart rate and also labour contractions from the EGM signals.

Baby heart rate is perfectly good and no contractions was detected. Just a false alarm. About two hours later, I was allowed to go home. Darling said I am over "kan cheong". But it is better silly than sorry.